Becoming resilient

In 2023, right after giving birth to my second baby, I found out my husband had been living a secret life, and that my marriage was built on lies and deception. I was postpartum, on maternity leave, with a newborn and two-year-old. I fell into depression, developed PTSD symptoms, and couldn't see a way out.

As an only child of Chinese immigrants who put every penny into me, I worked my way from community college to Cal State to Harvard University, then went into engineering at NASA and Silicon Valley. I had always done what I was supposed to do: work hard, live responsibly, be a good wife and mother, and build a strong foundation for my family. None of it prepared me for this.

In the first months I couldn't eat or sleep. I was scrolling for answers at 3am while feeding a newborn. The programs I found online were created by men for the addict/cheater, and support for the wives came secondary. None of the programs talked about how betrayal trauma affects the mother-child bond, which was my greatest concern. I was struggling alone and had to come up with my own solutions by piecing together research spread across different experts, books, podcasts and programs. I'm grateful for all the resources already out there, but I still had to do a lot of work navigating this field as a mother of young children.

I was desperate and threw money at the problem: I did therapy three times a week. Traveled across states to a treatment center for my ex husband. Attended online and in-person support groups. Paid for courses, books, and consumed every podcast I could find. I spent over $70,000 and three years piecing together what I learned, to create a system that's catered to women and mothers - something I needed at the time.

Now, I'm a proud single mom, living abroad, and redesigning my life with intention and purpose. My children are happier and healthier, which is all the proof I need to know that it worked. Our home is calm and peaceful. And my bond with my children has not only healed, but become stronger. Despite all the damage that happened in those hard years, I learned to repair my relationship with my children, myself, and the world.

I'm not particularly special. I was just lucky enough to have access to resources and have the capacity to piece things together. I stumbled upon safe and trustworthy practitioners, and friends and family who showed up for me. I know not everyone has that, which is why I created this course - to help guide mothers through the vast amount of resources out there, help you move through the stages of rebuilding, so that you are set up for success after the greatest destruction of your life.

Children need their mothers, that's why it's important for you to succeed. We can do this together.